With the recent passing of my Grandma, it reminds me, again, that LIFE IS TOO SHORT – we need to take action in the current NOW and stop waiting to do all the things we want to do “someday”.
So, I decided that I wanted to go to my Grandma’s memorial – but the only way that I can afford to do that is to STOP paying for my outrageous storage fees and free up that money so I can use it on these outrageous gas prices instead!
One of the 1st steps to getting my stuff out of an expensive storage unit is to figure out where I’m going to put all my stuff. When I moved out of my apartment, I wasn’t ready to just “get rid” of everything that I own. But my husband and I had a lot of heart to hearts… as he does his best to be aware of his triggers, get help for his rage issues and continue admitting when he’s done wrong, I step back and look at his house as a viable option to at least, store my stuff.
But that’s not where this ends – he wants me to move back in of course.
I want to be with my children.
I want to be a family again.
I want to believe that my husband is making a serious turnaround.
I stew in my confusion and go back and forth on the merry-go-round between fear and reality and dare I say “HOPE”.
I don’t know which direction to go right now… so I let it go to my Higher Power and just wait until I can feel a strong direction for life.
The plan is to STILL live with my mom until June 1st as I wait for direction – but meanwhile, my family and I are bonding again – we are spending time together – we are making plans for my re-entry.
The 1st of these plans is to get the couches out of storage. My couch set is nicer than Jim’s couch set so fine – I will give Jim my couch set. If I end up moving in, then the couch set becomes OURS, if I don’t – I will have to buy myself another couch set. But before we do that – Jim needs to regrout the flooring.
If you ever watched any my older videos of this living room, it used to have carpet with a small section of walkway near the door that was tiled. Well, shortly after I left, to keep him from raging in an unhealthy way – and to prevent him from crashing emotionally, he got productive and ripped out the nasty carpet.
Eventually, he started to lay the flooring but he was lazy about it and didn’t want to get on his hands and knees to grout it properly. The floor was so bad, tiles were breaking. So Jim said, if we are going to move the couches in here – we need to regrout the floor 1st.
So that’s the plan – we cleared out the front room, regrouted the living room and we’re getting ready for my couches. All while I turn it over to God and recognize that I’m a moving target, I never finish what I started and Jim apparently doesn’t either! HA-HA!
Ok – I will see you on the next video!
Thanks for watching and supporting me during this journey!
Music: piano moment by bensound
& Positive Motivation by purple planet
& Trust in You by Lauren Daigle
& Face Myself by Gabriel
Website: https://deslobstudent.wordpress.com/
Deslob Student: a vlog about learning how to be less of a slob 